Happy Anniversary
I've been ready for hours and I'm wearing my bestOrdered champagne and flowers and you're not even dressedTonight's a special night to remember with prideThese twenty happy years since you became my bride
It is all too absurd; you're so cross and abruptSo I don't say a word or you're bound to eruptYour peculiar moods I've experienced beforeSo I'll pour another drink and quietly pace the floor
It's a quarter to eight as we fretfully waitFor your little black dress; that was promised by sixIs it just rotten luck when we're doing the townThat the fates should conspire to let us mortals down
I have seats for a show and it's opening nightMy shoes do not fit me and my suit is too tightAnd you sit there and curse, an occasional curseAnd I've got a headache that's quickly getting worse
Happy anniversary, Happy anniversaryThey deliver your frock but you're still in distressIt was past nine o clock when I helped you to dressI tried to do you up but it wasn't my dayFor then to fill my cup your zipper stuck half way
I got all in a sweat, over anxious and vexedWill I ever forget the thing that happened nextYour dress just came apart with one terrible tearYour disappointed cries were more than I could bear
At eleven at last, when we got into townWe arrived at the show but the curtain was downI suggested a bite. No, no you wanted to walkYou had no appetite and no desire to talk
So we strolled for an hour and the evening was sweetAnd I bought you a flower from a man in the streetAnd we kissed on the sidewalk without reason or rhymeAnd we knew that our love is much stronger than timeHappy anniversary, Happy anniversary, Happy anniversary