TMZ
You’re sort of famous, a minor celebrityAnd so it only makes sense the world would beObsessed with every single thing you do
They’re running ‘round with their camcorders in the nightThey’re lurking patiently in hoping that they just mightSee something real embarrassing you do
The bad hair day and sweat-stained t-shirtsThat’s the story that they’re gonna featureWith exclusive pics of your flabby behindYou think you’re all alone but that’s right when you’ll find
A bunch of paparazzi popping out of nowhereCameras in your face and then suddenlyYou’re on TMZ, you’re on TMZ
Following you when you’re walking down the streetAnd asking stupid questions while you’re trying to eatSo you cover your face thinking to yourself“Hey, isn’t this creepy?”
And they’re out there praying you’ll have a big meltdownAnd take them on a little car chase through this whole townThey’ll be there with you when you’re going to jailFirst on the scene for every wardrobe fail
You just picked up some transvestiteSeconds later it’s up on the websiteGet a Vegas wedding, a quickie divorceAnd they’ll be sneaking in snapping pictures, of course!
And if they ever catch you picking your noseOr stumbling down the street on a drunken spreeYou’re on TMZ
Stalking you, just waiting by your front doorTrailing you through airport securityThey were TMZ, they were TMZ
Spoken:We caught this Oscar nominee picking up dog poopIs that a baby bump?I pronounce her guilty of leaving the house while fatLook who’s drinking coffeeEverything celebrities do is fascinating!
Oh, let me tell you, it’s getting to the pointWhere a famous person can’t even get a D.U.I.Or go on a racist rantThose guys are all around so you really shouldn’t dareGo to every club in town if you’ve lost your underwear
Seems that every single timeA star decides to shave their headOr ram their car into a treeThey’re on TMZ
If they catch you peeing in the bushesLater on that night, well, I guaranteeYou’re on TMZ, you’re on TMZ, you’re on TMZEvery single celebrity knows they’re gonna beThey’re on TMZ