Big Weenie
[Intro]I don't understand! Why are you being so MEAN?You're a MEAN, MEAN MAN!
[Hook]You are just jealous of me cause you, you just can't do what I doSo instead of just admitting it, you walk around and sayAll kinds of really mean things about meCause you're a meanie, a meanieBut it's only cause you're, just really jealous of meCause I'm what you want to be, so you just look like an idiotWhen you say these mean things, cause it's too easy to seeYou're really just a big weenie, big weenie
[Verse 1]Alright listen, I need you to focusI need you to go dig deep in your mind, this is importantWe are going to perform an experiment of the sortsI'm going to have to ask you to bear with me for a momentNow I need you to open, your mind - your eyes close 'emYou are now about to be placed under my hypnosisFor the next four and a half minutes, we are going to exploreInto your mind to find out why you're so fucking jealousNow why did they make Yoo-Hoo? Pippity ga-ga poo-pooPsych I'm kidding, I just wanted to see if you're still listeningOkay, now I need your undivided attentionSir I have a question - why do I always sense thisUndeniable tension, from the moment that I enter into the roomIt gets all quiet and whispersWhenever there's conversation, why am I always mentioned?I've been dying to ask, it's been itching at me, is it just because
[Hook]
[Verse 2]Alright now I, I just flubbed a lineI was going to say something extremely importantBut I forgot who or what it was - I fucked upPsych I'm kidding again you idiot, no I didn'tThat's just what you wanted to hear from me is that I FUCKED up, ain't it?But I can bust one take without looking at no paperIt doesn't take a bunch of takes or me to stand here in this booth all dayFor me to say the truth, okay? You're drooling, you have tooth decayYour mouth is open, you're disgusting, what the fuck you eat for lunch?A bunch of sweets or something, what? You munch a bunch of Crunch 'N Munch?Your tooth is rotten to the gum, your breath stinks, wanna chew some gum?Yes I do sir, what am I on? You sir, are on truth serum"Marshall I'm so jealous of you, please say you won't tell nobodyI'd be so embarrassed, I'm just absolutely terrifiedThat someone's gonna find out why I'm saying all these terribleEvil and awful mean things, it's my own insecurities!"
[Hook]
[Verse 3]Alright now we, we're going to conductThat experiment that we were talking about earlierJust to see what a frog, looks like when it takes two hits of ecstasyCause that's exactly what your eyes look like, want to check to see?Here's a mirror, notice the resemblance here?Wait, let me put these sunglasses on, now look in this mirrorHow about now? What do you have in common?You're both green with envy and look like idiots with sunglasses on 'emYou look like I sound like, singing about weeniesNow take my weenie out of your mouthThis is between me and you, I know you're not happyI know you'd much rather see me lying in the corner of a roomSomewhere crying, curled up in a ball tweaked out of my mind dyingThere is no denying that my weenie is much bigger than yours isMine is like sticking a banana between two orangesWhy you even doing this to yourself, it's pointlessWhy do we have to keep on going through this, this is torturousMy point is this - that if you say mean things, your weenie will shrinkNow I forgot what the chorus is, you're just a
[Hook]
Get the fuck off my dick!