Going Through Changes
[Hook]I'm going through changesI'm going through changes
[Verse 1]Lately I really, feel like I'm rolling for delph like PhillyFeel like I'm losing control of myself, I sincerelyApologize if all that I sound like is I'm complainingBut life keeps on complicating, andI'm debating on leaving this world this eveningEven my girls can see I'm grieving, I try and hide it but I can'tWhy do I act like I'm all high and mightyWhen inside, I'm dying, I am finally realizing I need helpI can't do it by myself, too weak2 weeks I've been having ups and downsGoing through peaks and valleys, dilly dallyingAround with the idea, of ending the shit right hereI'm hatin my reflection, I walk around the house tryna fight mirrorsI can't stand what I look like, yeah, I look fat, but what do I care?I give a fuck, only thing I fear, is HailieI'm afraid if I close my eyes I might see her..shit
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[Verse 2]I lock myself in the bedroom, bathroom, napping at noonYeah dad's in a bad mood, he's always snapping at youMarshall what happened that you, you can't stop with these pillsAnd you've fallen off with your skills, and your own fans are laughing at youIt become a problem you're too pussy to tackle, get upBe a man, stand, a real man would've had this shit handledKnow you just had your heart ripped out and crushedThey say Proof just flipped out, homie just whipped out and bustNah, it ain't like Doody to do thatHe wouldn't fuckin' shoot at, no-body, he fights firstBut dwelling on it only makes the night worseNow I'm popping Vics, Percs and Methadone pills"Yeah Em, tight verse, you killed it"Fucking drug dealers hang around me like yes menAnd they gonna do whatever I says when, I says itIt's in their best interest to protect their investmentAnd I just lost my fuckin' best friend, so fuck it, I guess then:
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[Verse 3]My friends can't understand this new meThat's understandable man, but think how bananas you'd beYou'd be an animal tooIf you were trapped in this fame and caged in it like a zooAnd everybody's looking at you, what you want me to do?I'm starting to live like a recluse and the truth isFame starting to give me an excuse, to be at an all time lowI sit alone in my home theater, watching the same damn DVDOf the first tour, the last tour, he was still aliveAnd it hurt sore, fast forward, sleeping pills'll make me feel alrightAnd if I'm still awake in the middle of the nightI just take a couple more, yeah you're motherfuckin rightI ain't slowing down for no one, I am almost homeward boundAlmost in a coma, yeah homie come on, dole em out"Daddy, don't you die on me, Daddy, better hold your ground"Fuck, don't I know the sound of that voiceYeah baby hold me down
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[Verse 4]Wake up in the hospital, full of tubes, but somehow I'm pulling throughSwear when I come back I'mma be bulletproofI'mma do it just for Proof, I think I should state a fewFacts, cause I may not get a chance again to say the truthShit it just hit me that what if I would not have made it throughI think about the things I would never got to say to youI'd never get to make it right, so here's what I came to doHailie this one is for you, Whitney and Alaina tooI still love your mother, that'll never changeThink about her every day, we just could never get it togetherHey, wish there was a better way, for me to say itBut I swear on everything, I'd do anything for her on any dayThere are just too many things to explainWhen it rains guess it pours, yes it doesWish there wasn't any pain, but I can't pretend there ain'tI ain't placing any blame, I ain't pointing fingersHeaven knows I've never been a saintI know it just feels like we just pissed away our historyAnd just today, I looked at your picture, almost hate to sayI miss you sub consciously, wish it didn't end this wayBut I just had to get away, don't know whyI don't know what else to say, I guess I'm
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