Weird Al Yankovic "Perform This Way" letra

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Perform This Way

My mama told me when I was hatched:Act like a superstar!Save your allowance, buy a bubble dressAnd someday you will go far

Now on red carpets, well, I’m hard to missThe press follows everywhere I goI’ll poke your eye out with a dress like thisBack off and enjoy the show!

I’m sure my critics will say it’s a grotesque displayWell, they can bite me, baby – I perform this wayI might be wearing Swiss cheese or maybe covered with beesIt doesn’t mean I’m crazy – I perform this way (perform this way)

Ooo, my little monsters pay lots ‘cause I perform this wayBaby, I perform this way (perform this way)Ooo, don’t worry, I’m okay, hey, I just perform this wayI’m not crazy, I perform this way

I’ll be a troll or evil queenI’ll be a human jelly bean‘Cause every day is Halloween (for me)

I’m so completely originalMy new look is all the rageI’ll wrap my small intestines ‘round my neckAnd set fire to myself on stage

I’ll wear a porcupine on my headOn a W-H-I-M (hey, hey, hey)And for no reason now I’ll sing in FrenchExcusez-moi, Qui a pété? (Who cut the cheese?)

Got my straight jacket today, it’s made of gold laméNo, not because I’m crazy – I perform this wayI strap prime rib to my feet, cover myself with raw meatI’ll bet you’ve never seen a skirt steak worn this way

Don’t be offended when you seeMy latest pop monstrosityI’m strange, weird, shocking, odd, bizarreI’m Frankenstein, I’m Avatar

There’s nothing too embarrassingI’ll honestly do anythingBut wear white after Labor Day‘Cause baby, I perform this way

Hope you won’t think it’s cliché if I go nude todayDon’t call the cops now, baby, I perform this wayNo reason I should regret all the attention I getI’m not completely crazy, I perform this way, yeah

I perform this way-hey, I perform this way-heyI’m always deviating from the norm this way-heyI perform this way-hey, I perform this way-heyI’m really not insane – I just perform this way-hey

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