You Can Call Me Al
A man walks down the streetHe says "Why am I soft in the middle now?"Why am I soft in the middle?The rest of my life is so hardI need a photo-opportunityI want a shot at redemptionDon't want to end up a cartoonIn a cartoon graveyardBonedigger, BonediggerDogs in the moonlightFar away my well-lit doorMr. Beerbelly, BeerbellyGet these mutts away from meYou know, I don't find this stuff amusing anymore
If you'll be my bodyguardI can be your long lost palI can call you BettyAnd Betty when you call meYou can call me Al
A man walks down the streetHe says "Why am I short of attention?"Got a short little span of attentionAnd, wow, my nights are so longWhere's my wife and family?What if I die here?Who'll be my role-model,Now that my role-model is gone, gone?He ducked back down the alleyWith some roly-poly little bat-faced girlAll along, alongThere were incidents and accidentsThere were hints and allegations
If you'll be my bodyguardI can be your long lost palI can call you BettyAnd Betty when you call meYou can call me AlCall me Al
A man walks down the streetIt's a street in a strange worldMaybe it's the Third WorldMaybe it's his first time aroundHe doesn't speak the languageHe holds no currencyHe is a foreign manHe is surrounded by the sound, the soundCattle in the marketplaceScatterlings and orphanagesHe looks around, aroundHe sees angels in the architectureSpinning in infinityHe says Amen! and Hallelujah!
If you'll be my bodyguardI can be your long lost palI can call you BettyAnd Betty when you call meYou can call me AlCall me Al