Soul Suckin' Jerk (Version 1)
I'm standing right here with a beer in my handAnd my mouth is full of sand and I don't understandBig fat fingers pointing into my faceTelling me to get busy cleaning up this placeFourteen days, I been sleeping in a barnBetter get a paycheck tattooed on my arm
Whistling Dixie with the Dixie cup filledWith the barbecue sauce and the dental floss chilledI got bent like a wet cigaretteAnd she's coming after me with a butterfly netRiding on a bloodhound, ringing a bellBlack cat wrapped and I'm rolling up a hillPencil in my leg and I'm trying not to begTaking turns breaking words with the bacon and eggs
Now they got me in a birdcage flapping my jawLike a pretzel in the stars just waiting to fallSo give me what I got to get so I can go'Cause I ain't washing dishes in a ditch no more
'Cause I ain't gonna work for no soul-suckin jerkI'm gonna take it all back and I ain't sayin' jack'Cause I ain't gonna work for no soul-suckin jerkI'm gonna take it all back and I ain't sayin' jack
You know it! (That's right)Rockin' the town like a mouldy crouton(Flying through the air with grease)
I got a job making money for the manThrowing chicken in a bucket with a soda pop canPuke-green uniform on my backI had to set it on fire in a vat of chicken fatI leaped on the counter like a bird with no hairRunning through the minimall in my underwear
I got lost downtown, couldn't find a ride homeThe sun went down, I got frozen to the bone'Til a hooker let me share her fake fur coatAs I took a little nap, the cops picked up this foolI tried to explain I was only trying to get warm
I knew I never ever should have burned my uniformHe said, "Too bad, better bite the bullet hard, son."I didn't have no teeth, so I stole his gunAnd I crawled out the window with my shadow and a spoonDancing on the roof, shooting holes in the moon
Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah