Supermodel's Legs
This morning it occurred to meI might not look quite like the natural blondeAnd I can't help but feel connedThe picture on the packet showed a model with no baggage,Promising wild sex and marriageWith a big colour chart wand
This morning it occurred to meI never will quite have a supermodel's legs (Never in a million years!)Unless I cut each one in halfBecome half an octopus -The two become synonymouswith cocaine glamour, riches, beauty, and crack
I took a trip to the National GalleryFor something more refreshing in what Rueben saw
My supermodel's legsThink they were plucked from a Rueben-esque world (ah, ah! ah ah!)My supermodel's legsLook pretty crap on a 5-foot-4 girl (ah ah ahhh!)
Women, men and in-betweens -- why don't you just stop dieting?Go bake, eat cake, go cheer, drink beer!Worrying is boring!
If people said eat loads of cakeYou wouldn't want much anywayAnd then you would've and stuffed your faceAnd looked like King Henry VIII
Present; We're told off every dayFor living our lives the wrong damn way"Suck my left one!" is what I sayIf i want six coffees a day!
Women, men and in-betweens - why don't you just stop dieting?Go bake, eat cake, go cheer, drink beer!Worrying is boring me!
Oh, I get more turned on by pink cupcakes than heroinNot "rock and roll"; I'm much more Mary Poppins
Oh supermodel's legsThey never held up much weight in my world (ooh wa ooh wa! ooh wa ooh wa!)Oh supermodel's legsCuz women should be women, girls should be allowed to be girls (ah ah! ah ah!)
(Too right!)